Why Isn’t Sri Lanka Represented In The 2014 Winter Olympics In Sochi?

Anura Guruge, June 8, 2013.

Anura Guruge

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To access Sri Lankan Olympic Committee Website.

To access Sri Lankan Olympic Committee Website.

Loon, N.H. last March. I was 59.

Loon, N.H. last March. I was 59.

It is not conceivable that I am the ONLY Sri Lankan (or at least ex-Sri Lankan) that skis (and used to ski quite well too).

With the millions of Sri Lankans living abroad, and the millions of kids born to those abroad, there must, just my the laws of averages, be lots of Sri Lankans (or those that can qualify as Sri Lankans) who ski, snowboard, skate, play hockey etc. There are thousands in Canada. Yes, it is possible that many are averse to the cold — but again if they grew up in Canada, the U.S., N.Z. etc. some of them, if nothing else because of peer pressure, would have got into alpine sports.

And then are are ALL the married partners that will be eligible to compete as Sri Lankan. Again, I know that there are LOTS of Sri Lankans married to other nationals. There are probably Sri Lankan spouses from 100 different countries around the world. Some of them, again by the laws of numbers, must have reached some level of proficiency in winter sports.

Plus, Jamaica doesn’t get snow either. But they have their gamed bobsled team.

So what gives here?

Wow. I just looked it up. The population of Sri Lanka is NOW 20 million! Wow. It was 12 million when I last lived there in 1967. That is a 67% increase in … yes … 47 years. But, that is a lot. Yes, I know that Sri Lankan men put Clinton to shame when it comes to being able to keep their peckers in their pants, but this is crazy. 20 million. I thought it was 16 million and I was looking at the population figures (provided by NBC) for the countries participating in Sochi. I was amazed that Greece only has a 10 million population. So Sri Lanka has twice as many people. Come on … we can find some winter olympians.

20 million. That is too many. I think it is time to put birth control hormones in the water supply. Trust me, that is the only way. 

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